Skip to content

A sensible request from the Manager, poetically presented

15-Apr-12

I spotted this sign on a supply closet in the men’s restroom at my accountant’s building in South San Francisco. A sensible request, poetically presented.

If you don’t have the
key
Please don’t open
the door
With other tools

Thanks
Manager

Clamp Boss: Adventures in Word Substitution

11-Mar-12

Last week my company issued a press release quoting me. Itself not necessarily worth reporting on this blog, but some web sites have published it substituting various words. I’m guessing they do this as link bait for SEO, so they show up differently from the sites that simply republish releases verbatim.

But there’s some humor in the “after” compared to the “before”. Like it’s almost a human speaking, but not quite.

Excerpt from the release as issued (full release on BusinessWire here):

“A health care transparency tool is only effective if employees use and gain value from it,” said Ethan Prater, vice president of products, Castlight Health. “Castlight goes beyond great technology and data to help customers like Regis create well-designed programs that engage users and drive cost-conscious health care decisions that benefit employees and employers alike.”

With the same excerpt “substituted” (on a random site here):

“A illness care clarity apparatus is usually efficient if employees use and earn worth from it,” mentioned Ethan Prater, clamp boss of products, Castlight Health. “Castlight goes over great technology and data to help customers similar to Regis emanate well-designed programs that rivet users and expostulate cost-conscious illness care decisions that benefit employees and employers alike.”

There’s an album title in here somewhere. Clamp boss, indeed.

  • Full release also on Castlight Health’s site here

Parting Hair

08-Jul-11

As I get older, this is actually pretty much how I feel…

"If I had to do it all over again I wouldn't change much - maybe part my hair on the other side."

From The New Yorker (their Cartoon Bank is down, so I can’t link to the bigger/purchase page, but you can find it there if you’re interested).

UPDATE: my friend Tom replies with the cartoon below…

Moses Parting His Hair

The Sausage Source: So Many Questions

28-May-11

My friend Jason took this photo in Hillsborough, New Hampshire. As he says, it evokes questions on many levels….

 

Who is supposed to respond to this sign?

And just how many secrets do meat processors have?

Happy Birthday, Mom!

11-May-11

This time of year is special to me – Mother’s Day and my mother’s birthday always come close together (sometimes on the same day). Today my mother would have been 67.

When I started this blog a few years ago, I posted a remembrance of Mom that I revisit every so often. I still think about her every day.

Report: 5th Annual (2010) Barrel Aged Beer Festival at The Bistro: Hayward, CA

17-Nov-10

This past Saturday (November 13, 2010) I attended The Bistro’s 5th Annual West Coast Barrel Aged Beer Festival in Hayward, CA. I’m a regular at The Bistro’s Festivals (you can browse past reports and beer lists here). This particular lineup was the possibly the greatest I’ve seen at any festival. Downright epic.

The two-sided tasting sheets (reproduced below – click to see full-size images) listed 61 beers. “Barrel Aged” is of course not a beer style in itself – you can put any beer into a barrel – so the variety at this festival is larger than at style-specific events like the IPA Festival. This also means there’s not a professional judging, just a People’s Choice Award voted by attendees. Most beers tend to be heavier stouts, with the occasional Belgian-style wild beers showing up and some crazy one-offs here and there.

(As of this writing, has not seemed to be announced.) [Update: folks on the Beer Advocate message board say that the winner was Lagunitas' Bourbon Barrel Cappuccino Stout.]

[Update: The Bistro's web site lists the People's Choice winner as Drake's Wild Stallyns. Runners-up, in order of votes received: Lagunitas Bourbon Cappuccino Stout, Avery Rumpkin, Glacier Big Woody, Bear Republic Nectarine Grizz, Fifty Fifty Imperial Eclipse Stout, and Sierra Nevada Barrel Life & Limb.]

This year I tried twenty of the beers. I’m worried that my palate can’t be trusted with that many, but I did rate (on a 10 point scale) and take notes on each, so I’m going to post each brief review here in alphabetical order by brewery. Almost every beer was good – only two didn’t pass muster, which indicates a pretty amazingly consistent level of quality. We live in the best time for beer the world has ever seen.

  • Avery Rumpkin (8.5-): A heavy pumpkin beer done mostly right. “Yum, sweet, not syrupy to start.” Not overwhelming with weird additives, but still “lots of spice, nutmeg?” “Maybe too much alcohol?” No head, clear medium red/brown. Doesn’t linger, maybe a little boozy, very drying on the end. One of the day’s most interesting beers.
  • Bear Republic Barrel Aged Ryevalry (7.5): “Yummy, fruity, yeasty, rye.” I love Bear Republic, and I love rye beers, but haven’t cottoned to the regular Ryevalry. The barrel aged version, well made as it is, doesn’t quite catch my fancy, either.
  • Drake’s Brett Butler (8.0+): “Russian River-esque”. A light, tart, lean beer. Love the Brett in this one. Finishes a little weak, then some burn in the chest. But really 9.0%?
  • Drake’s Volte-Face (7.5+): Sour, but not too dry or puckering.” “Maybe a little flabbier than Russian River’s style.”
  • Drake’s The Creator Has a Mastertape (9.0): One of the best of the day. Ugly, murky appearance, but otherwise the perfect porter style. Has that fizzy edge and powderiness, tastes like a heavier, higher-alcohol beer than it is.
  • Fifty Fifty Imperial Eclipse Stout – 2010 Four Roses Bourbon Barrel (8.5): Fifty Fifty has nailed the barrel-aged imperial stout. They have a great base beer that they perfectly age in beautiful American whiskey barrels. Four Roses is my favorite bourbon, but this beer wasn’t quite my favorite barrel-aged stout at Festival this day or from Fifty Fifty ever. A little thinner feeling than its companion beer (see below). Still, a great example of what a beautifully aged beer can take from a great bourbon barrel.
  • Fifty Fifty Imperial Eclipse South – 2010 Heaven Hill / Rittenhouse Rye Barrel (9.5): My favorite of the day. A great base beer aged in a barrel formerly holding my favorite rye (see my post here). “Sensational. Chocolate, hints of coffee, some sweet, some dry, some wood. Full of flavor, but not too much of anything.”
  • Firestone Walker 14 (9.0): The annual blend from Firestone Walker is quite deservedly a cult favorite. I’ve loved every one since the initial release of X. “Smooth, well-crafted. Maybe a touch too perfectly honed? Such finesse.”
  • Firestone Walker Nectar Black Xantus (8.0+): “Coffee, coffee, coffee – yum!” Not acrid or dry coffee, just thick and rich. Maybe a little hot on the throat. Is that what happens with a 12.0% beer?
  • Glacier Brewhouse Big Woody Barleywine (8.5+): I love English-style barleywines (not so much the American version), and this is a great example. A tiny bit too much vanilla for my taste, but otherwise superbly made. Yum.
  • Lagunitas Bourbon Barrel Cappuccino Stout (8.0+): A great introduction to barrel aged beer in general. Very good, almost great – all of the wood, whiskey, and dryness that barrel aging brings. “Reminds me of Schlafly’s barrel-aged beers.” Is the standard Lagunitas Cappuccino Stout 11.0%, or was this a ramped up base beer?
  • Marin 21 Year Old Ale (7.0): One of my favorite breweries, though I think Arne is still dialing in the sour styles. I liked this one, but it’s not “tight” like what Russian River has shown us. The finish feels sort of flabby.
  • Moylan’s Ryan Sullivan’s Imperial Stout 2008 (6.0-): Tied for least favorite of the day. I really like the base beer in its native form, but this seemed sour when it wasn’t intended to be. “Shows the perils and unpredictability of barrel aging.”
  • Moylan’s Wet Hopsickle 2010 (7.0-): The base beer is inconsistent, but when good, one of my favorite beers ever. In this case I thought, “Hoppy but winey, tannic, doesn’t seem to know what it wants to be. Simcoe-style burn down the chest.”
  • Port Brewing Older Viscosity 2009 (8.0-): Dark beer, looks like a stout. But “smells fruity, winey.” Is that roast in there? “Nice to get some hints of roast, though this isn’t a stout at its heart.”
  • Russian River Consecration 09 (9.0+): Consecration is generally in my top five beers ever. Such a masterpiece. The ’09 was dryer than the ’10 (see below), some vinegar-style acid. So yummy. What a slightly tart but still rich barrel aged beer should be.
  • Russian River Consecration 10 (9.5-): “So good. Big favorite. Tart but not puckering, so taut.” Obviously a sister to the ’09, but milkier. A great beer.
  • Sierra Nevada Life and Limb (8.0-): “Like the Lagunitas – no obvious coffee, but still very typical or well-done barrel aged beers in general.” Hints of coconut in this one.
  • Speakeasy Bourbon Barrel Aged Payback Porter (6.0-): I love the base beer, and always sought it out when it was available only on tap as Hunters Point Porter. But this version is a failure. No flavor, only a thin texture of vanilla and stinging alcohol. A shame.

Kudos to Vic Kralj and team at The Bistro for putting on these festivals. The price for this one was $40 for a souvenir glass and ten tasting tickets, with additional tickets $2 each. Pours seemed to range from 2-4 ounces. Not cheap, but absolutely worth the price.

My blog covers all sorts of unrelated topics. You can find just the posts on beer here.

Drakes Wyld Stallyns
Honorable Mentions (in order of votes recieved)
Lagunitas Bourbon Cappuccino Stout
Avery Rumpkin
Glacier Big Woody
Bear Republic Nectarine Grizz
Fifty Fifty Imperial Eclipse Stout
Sierra Nevada Barrel Life & Limb